Trump Wows Congress With Improvised Ballad

Trump sings?President Donald Trump addresses a joint session of Congress on Capitol Hill in Washington, Tuesday, Feb. 28, 2017, as Vice President Mike Pence and House Speaker Paul Ryan of Wis., listen. (Jim Lo Scalzo/Pool Image via AP)

Tuesday night, President Donald J. Trump gave a riveting speech to the joint houses of Congress in Washington, DC.  The president discussed his agenda, condemned his critics, and then burst into an impromptu singing session that lasted for a good seven and half minutes.  The vice president and various select members of the cabinets quickly tuned their instruments and provided a subtle, new jack swing vibe under Trump’s brazen melody.

At first, all were shocked that the United States President would attempt to sing during such an auspicious occasion, but then the entire room began to clap and gyrate and sing along.  Politicians, the press, and other selected members of the Washington intelligentsia in attendance were all suitably impressed with The Donald’s crooning, falling easily under his sway as he intoned “…that wall, she’s gonna be a beauty…”, “…I’m working on a deal for that…”, and “…I’ve got a yuge agenda, it’s really, really yuge!”

Soundboard operators for the address say they’ve mastered the track, now called “The Big Agenda Boogie” and it’s currently available on iTunes for $0.99.  All proceeds from the sale of the president’s first single will go to the construction of the proposed border wall.